Every so often, God seems to poke his head into my heart to whisper of how he loves me. Sometimes it’s “just because”. As if I am his sweetheart and he wants me to know just how special I am to him. Sometimes he comes in during the hard moments as though to say, “See? I’ve got this. You can trust me.”
It fascinates and humbles me; this thought that the King of the Universe should be so inclined as to demonstrate his love towards me. It’s my Heavenly Father, reaching out his hands so I can dance on his toes while he embraces me in a huge bear hug. He sends a kiss on my cheek, or a belly laugh at an inside joke. And often, he lends me his shoulder to be stained by my tears.
As a young girl, I remember moments when I would be outside on a spring afternoon and the warm breeze would brush gently across my face. I could envision him tucking my hair behind my ear and saying, “I love you.” I was captivated by his presence and his love for me. When my focus was on him, the pressures of growing up in the world didn’t matter so much.
I was about 13 years old when my sister was struck by a car while crossing the street. Strangely enough, her accident was one of the moments that propelled me into a deeper relationship with my Lord. I watched him hold our family close during the scary moments. He took care of us financially and I gave him all the credit for her quickened recovery. I began to see that my life mattered to him.
In preparation for attending college, one of my major concerns was the ability to pay for my education. By his grace, I was able to receive a significant scholarship and a grant that not only covered my first year, but left me with a little extra for miscellaneous expenses. It felt like God was handing me a check and saying, “Use it well.” I couldn’t believe that he would entrust me with so much. Maybe he saw potential in me that I had not yet seen.
I was very young when I first entrusted my love story to God, and it was during my college years that I saw it play out. There was this guy named Eric who I admired in many ways, and my heart flipped constantly as I attempted to reason away my feelings for him. Looking back, I see God in those years, smiling as he watched us shyly begin our relationship. On my wedding day, I felt loved beyond comparison that God would provide me with such a great man.
Sometimes it’s the simple things that stand out the most. One of the hardest parts of motherhood for me has been the lack of quality sleep. When my youngest was but an infant, my oldest stopped napping. I was a zombie. One day, we had someone doing some work on our home, and I dreaded the nap time experience. How to keep the children out of the way, yet happy and entertained? God spoke to me in my anxiousness. In the midst of the noise and the chaos right outside their bedroom, both girls napped simultaneously. This happened only a handful of times, and by far this was one of the most appreciated. He cared.
Just recently, I was going through a rough time. I was in a weird spot emotionally. The girls had been sick. Potty training wasn’t successful. I was trapped at home with a busted transmission. During this week, a friend texted me to see if she could drop something by my house. Mind you, my house is out of the way for practically everyone we know, so whatever she was wanting to do I appreciated that she was willing to drive out of her way to do it. You guys. She brought me Starbucks. And a sweet card. And a craft for the girls. And ingredients for making smoothies. And dinner. And so I cried. I cried when she was there and I cried for at least 10 minutes after she left. I want to cry now but that might be awkward as I’m in a public establishment. In that moment I felt loved beyond recognition. Through her actions, God was showing me just how much he loves me and how I don’t have to do anything for it. Nothing to earn it. Nothing to pay it back.
His love is completely free and entirely perfect.
And these experiences are just a glimpse of what he has for us. For me and for you. There is nothing that compares to the love of our Savior. Oh, that I might be able to return such love.
“Whatever is good and perfect is a gift coming down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. He chose to give birth to us by giving us his true word. And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession.” (James 1:17-18; NLT)